EDITOR'S NOTE: This column was full of humorous material when it left the office. Some settling may have occurred during shipment.
How I Spent My Summer Vacation...
Now that we're back from distant locales and enjoying the afterglow from restful family excursions, why don't we compare notes. Was your summer vacation as fun as mine? Did you relax, see the sights, have quality family time? Me neither.
But seriously, let's find out who got the most from their vacation by taking this quick and easy test:
For your summer trip, did you:
a) Enjoy a delightful week on the beach?
b) Relax on a scenic mountainside?
c) Drive 4,000 miles in a two-door Civic?
Your most memorable vacation experience was:
a) Making a human pyramid on the beach with your kids.
b) Taking a long, meaningful walk with your parents.
c) Getting an emergency root canal in Dallas.
Now that the vacation is over, you wonder why:
a) It seemed to go by so quickly.
b) Your family put off this wonderful trip for so long.
c) Your jaw still hurts.
You'll never forget this year's trip because:
a) Memories like these last forever.
b) The photos are great.
c) You can feel the hole with your tongue.
If you answered "C" to any of these questions, then you had just as much fun as I did. And you're already hoping that next year's vacation will offer some equally special times. Like maybe an appendectomy.
Religious News Corner
A few weeks ago a car was stopped for speeding in Fenton, Louisiana. Inside the car police found 20 naked people who claimed they disrobed because their clothes were "possessed by the Devil."