Ed Spivey Jr. was working as art director of the Chicago Sun-Times Sunday Magazine in 1974 when God called him to join the fledgling Sojourners community and work for its publication, then called the Post-American. The fact that Ed has not heard from God SINCE is not what’s important here, because Ed figures God had other things to do, what with making the world a more peaceful place. Why the world is still not a more peaceful place is none of Ed's business and he would never think to criticize God for slacking off since, who knows, God could have been sick or something.
But, 46 years later, Ed finally retired from Sojourners, content to have fulfilled his life-long dream of working hard for very little money. The only downside is that Ed is too old now to pursue his childhood plans of being either a cowboy or an astronaut. But such are the sacrifices one makes when one responds to the call of the Lord, even if immediately after that, the Lord apparently changed His or Her phone number.
Of a more biographic note, Ed holds an associate degree from Vincennes University. He then transferred to Indiana University where, despite his diligence at attending several classes each semester, he was denied a bachelor’s degree because a psychology professor did not appreciate Ed’s refusal to complete his rat experiment. Apparently, Ed’s was the only laboratory rat that bit, so Ed insisted on wearing thick motorcycle gloves when handling the animal which, the professor insisted, skewed the rat’s response to stimuli. Ed told the professor what he could do with stimuli, which unfortunately did not put the professor in the mood to accept Ed’s alternative suggestion, which was to study the response of rats being loudly cursed at while simultaneously being flushed down university toilets.
Since his college days he has made a bit of a name for himself, and not just “You, There,” which is the name his mother called him when she forgot. Ed won numerous awards for his design of Sojourners magazine, and his monthly humor column consistently garnered top honors from both religious and secular media associations. His book A Hamster is Missing in Washington, D.C. won the top prize in humor at the Independent Publisher Book Awards in New York City. (Due to scheduling conflicts, Ed was unable to attend the gala banquet, but had he gone he would have ordered the fish.) The book sold out of its second printing and Ed is now working on a second volume.
Ed is married and has two daughters, all of whom refuse to walk in public with him, on account of the little whoop-whoop sound he makes when he sees a fire truck. His beloved granddaughter, however, likes it when he does this.
Posts By This Author
Our Guarantee: The Following is 100% Research-Free!
Come here to quench your thirst with a glass of soothing pointlessness
To Go Where None Have Gone Before. But Then, Who Wants To ...
Virtual reality and other thoughts
H'rumphs
There's that darn curl again. Right in the middle, like I did it on purpose. I'm 42, and after a shower I get this stupid curl that sticks straight up and pulls the hair up from the sides. And that's the hair that I use to cover up my bald spots. Such vile degradations my body suffers. What other hideous surprise awaits me with each new morning? And why did God make hair if the Almighty One is just going to take it all back one clump at a time?
And another thing...oh, hello. Excuse me...I didn't see you pick up the magazine. I wasn't quite ready for you. But since you're here already, I heard this great God joke the other day. And because Sojourners is tight with God, I can tell it. (In any other magazine, of course, it would be a sin.) Anyway, a new arrival to Heaven was standing in line at the cafeteria and this person in a lab coat rushes up and cuts in front of him. Surprised, the new guy turns and remarks to the woman behind him, "I thought that in heaven everybody is treated equally. Who was that guy who just broke in line?" The woman replies, "Him? Oh, that's just God. Every so often he thinks he's a doctor."
And Now The News...
Filmmaker Oliver Stone reacted quickly to new conspiracy theories surrounding the Robert Kennedy assassination by announcing his upcoming movie, RFK.
Experts were not surprised that this workaholic director would take on another controversial project so soon after the release of JFK. But some expressed doubt that he would have time to finish his other current projects, which include:
· UK, a historical costume drama;
· Par-K, a documentary on the troubled American food industry;
· I'm OK, You're OK, an autobiographical reflection;
· Danny K: The Untold Story, and
· ¿Por K? a Spanish-language political thriller.
Bluster on the Airwaves
Rush Limbaugh is radio's populist bully, and he is a willing mouthpiece for the Right's election-year agenda.
'Give Me Liberty Or...How About a Small Fine?'
The bells of freedom are ringing loud and long in our nation's capital as the last of the proud patriots accused of aiding the contras have had their good names cleared by the courts.
A Man and His Dream ...
Barbie is lost at sea...what will happen to her and her things?